News Photo by Julie Riddle Matt Worsley, left, and Lee Blanchard discuss the impact of male stereotypes on fatherhood at Living Hope Church in Alpena on Tuesday.

ALPENA — While some dads fire up grills or open giftwrapped neckties this Father’s Day, others will sit behind bars, far from the hugs of their children.

Jail inmates, whether sentenced or awaiting sentencing, have to do without the comfort of family, and little help is available during their incarceration to help them strengthen family ties or focus on the parenting skills that could break cycles of crime and incarceration.

Incarceration strains family life, with parents unable to earn an income or help with child care. Roughly one in 28 children has a parent in jail or prison, according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, and more than 90% of incarcerated parents are fathers, according to a 2008 study published by the Bureau of Justice Statistics.

Currently, no local jails work with inmates on parenting skills or connect them to supports for their families during incarceration.

As at most other jails, Alpena County Jail inmates have been without most in-person programs — such as addiction recovery meetings and church services — for the past year because of COVID-19-related restrictions. Before the suspension of those programs, no program specifically targeted the family lives of inmates, according to Jail Administrator Sgt. Christina Bednarski.

Family member visits — through glass in the jail’s visitation room — were also suspended and have not yet resumed, although inmates can talk to their spouses and children via videoconference calls or phone calls.

Those calls cost money inmates sometimes don’t have. Bednarski makes sure inmates who can’t afford them have at least a piece of paper, envelope, and stamp to send a letter home.

A Catholic Human Services program helps incarcerated people but does not focus on their family lives, according to Clinical Supervisor Larry LaCross. The organization’s support services for families in the child welfare system sometimes overlap with parents who are incarcerated.

Lee Blanchard, pastor of Living Hope Church in Alpena, conducted pre-pandemic weekly church services in the jail for three years.

Like other programs in the jail, his wasn’t directed at fatherhood or parenthood. During the time of conversation and relationship-building with the inmates, however, he saw the stresses of inmates’ separation from their families.

Many of the inmates with whom Blanchard worked were second- or third-generation jail residents whose fathers were incarcerated before them. Many, as children, watched their fathers abuse drugs or alcohol or get in trouble with the law.

Some studies indicate children of inmates are more likely to become involved with the criminal justice system themselves, according to a study published by the National Institute of Corrections.

A men’s group that meets weekly at Blanchard’s church — a group which sometimes includes people who struggle with addiction or have been incarcerated — sparks difficult discussions that help men challenge each other to be better leaders, husbands, and fathers, Blanchard said.

“Too many men feel they’ve got to live up to a stereotype of what it is to be a man,” said Matt Worsley, who leads worship for the men’s group. “In some cases, that’s brash, cold, hard.”

When their attempts to be “manly men” by society’s standards get men into trouble, they don’t know how to respond except through a facade of toughness that can flow into how they interact with their families, Worsley said.

Blanchard hopes to take services inside the jail again soon. Meanwhile, he said, stopping father-to-child cycles of addiction, emotional struggles, and incarceration could start with conversations like those held around a table in a church sanctuary.

“You can’t fight that battle alone,” Blanchard said. “We were never meant to do it alone. That’s the power of community.”