Tim Skubick

Now that half of you have turned over to the obit section, you brave souls remaining, pick the right answer to this question: Which modern day Michigan governor coined the phrase “Jobs. Jobs. Jobs.”

(a) Jennifer Granholm because she was unfortunate to presided over the most drastic recession in recent memory as the state based domestic auto industry teetered on the brink of bankrupcy.

(b) John Engler because he was a strong ally of all his friends in the business community and wanted them to make more money which meant more employees.

(c) George Romney. Remember he segued from being the head of American Motors and a non career politician into the governor’s gig and if anything, he knew about the need for jobs just as the Japanese were getting a toe-hold on the domestic car industry.

(4) Jim Blanchard. He was fresh off his gig in Congress where he helped Lee what’s-his-name keep the Chrysler corporation from going under.

(5) You can’t fool me. It was none of them.

(Don’t peak for the answer at the bottom of this column.)

While the slogan Jobs cubed belongs to one governor, what the jargon stood for was at the apex of every modern day gov’s assignment as he or she took office including the most recent occupant Gov. Gretchen Whitmer.

She woke up one morning to read that one of her fav auto companies based in Dearborn was building not one but two new battery plants not in her state but down South where Kentucky and Tennessee governor’s were lapping up the credit. They mixed the right magic sauce to lure Ford down there but she sat in the executive resident kitchen nook bemoaning the fact that she was given only an 11th hour heads up from the Glass House gang. That meant even if she wanted in on the bidding there was no time to do it. That clock ran out long before she even knew it was ticking.

To say the least when she gathered on the capitol lawn the morning of the headline announcement, she characteristically tried to slap a happy face on an ugly development but no amount of perfume was going to spruce up that pig.

After enduring an onslaught of criticism from her least favorite fans for botching this, she and her Democratic lawmakers locked arms with GOP lawmakers, who also suffered collateral damage in this embarrassment, too and together they hatched “SOAR.” Never mind what that stands for it was a hurry up jobs, jobs, jobs, incentive program to get Michigan back in the competitive job creation sweepstakes.

And sure enough it worked. Months later the governor was at the front of the jobs line taking a bow because GM was creating new jobs in the governor’s backyard in Lansing and another in Oakland County. This time the happy face was real and the pig had no mud on it. But wait there’s more.

As fate would have it, sometime after that announcement, GM bailed from the Lansing project and sold it off to a competitor. Suffice to say the gov. did not stage a media event to “celebrate” that little fly in the ointment.

Which brings us to the current debate in our town where the governor and side-kick, House GOP Speaker Matt Hall, are keeping their bi-partisan chops alive as they’ve decided that SOAR has flown it’s last journey along with the MEGA program created by former Gov. John Engler.

Ditching them reflects the dramatic turnaround on both sides of the aisle in the legislature. A cabal of conservative R’s and Progressive D’s were signing from the same “anti-corporate welfare” hymnal. “We should not be picking winners and losers and what we have now is not working.”

While the dynamic-duo ain’t (sic) talking about their new strategy, one thing is likely to be on the table. The days of the state handing out incentive checks to would be new or current job providers before they actually create any jobs, are over with a capital O.

The state has had a devil of a time trying to recapture the leftover dollars after many companies abscounded with the initial checks, and then bailed out of the project.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice shame on us should be the motto of this new job creation foray.

Another item under review is to allow companies, once the workers are hired, to keep the income tax money they collect rather than sending the payments to the state. No money changes hands but business gets a savings and so the theory goes, the state sees the employment ranks rise.

Over there on the sidelines is the House GOP leader Rep. Bryan Posthumus son of the former GOP Lt. Governor Dick. His idea is to get each state to sign a “cease fire” agreement pledeging not to go into any other state and poach their jobs. And don’t kid yourself, this is going on beneath the radar and every governor knows it and they are sometime helpless to nip it in the bud to wit the governor’s bad run in with Ford.

On paper it’s a grand idea and it would work to save jobs from leaving, but the only problem is how do you get every state to sign off?

The cryptic answer is, you don’t.

Maybe the gov. and speaker should sit down with Jim Blanchard to see if he can coin another catchy slogan to get this new “jobs, jobs, jobs,” mission accomplished.