Come Heller high water …

∫ During a CNN interview, former Florida Republican congressional candidate Gina Sosa suggested all high school boys have done what Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh is accused of doing. “We’re talking about a 17-year-old boy in high school with testosterone running high,” she said. “Tell me what boy hasn’t done this in high school, please. I would like to know.” Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on there a second, Gina. I didn’t. And I’ve raised two sons who didn’t. The vast, vast, vast majority of young men don’t. Maybe we need a #HeyWaitaSecondIdidn’t movement to combat “boys will be boys” nonsense like yours. Boys will be boys is a horrible way to explain away sexual assault.

∫ Prediction: There’s too much smoke for Brett Kavanaugh’s nomination to succeed at this point. He’ll withdraw by Monday. And is there really anything wrong with that? When it comes to Supreme Court justices, shouldn’t we insist the Senate and the president err on the side of caution? It’s not as if Kavanaugh is the only qualified person out there.

∫ Did you hear this? Marathon gas stations this week began selling pumpkin spice-scented unleaded gas in stations nationwide. Can you believe it? You shouldn’t. Because I just made it up. But the fact that you almost, sort of believed me for a millisecond tells you that this is pumpkin spice’s world and we just live in it.

∫ Wednesday was National Pancake Day. Pancakes are useless things, aren’t they? They’re just dry, dull delivery vehicles for the stuff you put on them — syrup, butter, blueberries. No one eats just pancakes. Because pancakes don’t taste like anything. You could skip the pancakes altogether and just eat the stuff you put on it and be just as happy. And skinnier.

∫ Where do fruit flies materialize from in the fall? The kitchen is full of them — circling the bananas, the sink trap, the cabinet where the garbage can resides, the dog dish. Why now? It’s not cold enough yet outside to kill them. I think. And what do they suddenly want inside that isn’t available to them outside? There’s so many of them, I expect the dog to be carried off at some point.

∫ Someone reminded me that just last week I predicted the Detroit Lions wouldn’t win a game this year, and yet a few days later they did. I have no idea what this person is talking about. As with all of my bold and inevitably inaccurate sports predictions, I make it a practice to have no functioning memory of ever writing such words when they prove to be wrong.

∫ Why would anyone feel sorry for Bill Cosby? He’s a convicted rapist who got what he deserved. The only problem is he deserved it a long, long time ago. I wonder if they serve Pudding Pops in there?

∫ Uber is paying $148 million to settle lawsuits in 50 states stemming from a 2016 data breach that affected 50 million people. I didn’t even hear about the breach or the lawsuits. But maybe it’s because I don’t pay attention anymore. My personal info has been hacked from so many companies that I wouldn’t be surprised to see my Social Security number written in the sky in smoke.

∫ “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.” — Napoleon Hill.