“At the end of the day, dipping into the attack well of body-shaming, racism, misogyny, and ableism is just lazy. When people resort to these kinds of tactics, I simply think that they have lost the ability to debate the merits and content of a position. Instead, they want to play to the bot-fueled, troll-fed, worst of who humans can be.” — Bruce Reyes-Chow, “In Defense of Kindness: Why It Matters, How It Changes Our Lives, and How It Can Save the World”

In Washington has sprung up a cottage industry of kindness.

Politico Magazine in a recent piece detailed the new formation of think tanks, research programs, and activist groups with names like the Constructive Dialogue Institute, UNITE, and the Better Arguments Project. Each of those groups, along with initiatives at universities scattered about the country, aims to remedy the toxicity infecting our current public dialogue.

Hundreds of millions of dollars have been spent on those initiatives (leave it to Washington to monetize a societal need). That money has bought everything from symposiums to scorecards in attempts to turn the big ship politics toward kinder, gentler, more bipartisan seas.

Some of those groups have come up with some promising efforts.

UNITE, for example, has developed a Dignity Index, a way to measure the civility of speech, and aims to train people in government, business, and education on how to spot — and therefore avoid using — contemptuous language. If people in the grassroots practice dignity in their own dialogue, they then will demand the same of the people they elect.

Or so the thinking goes.

But none of those groups and none of their big money will solve what ails us.

Only we can do that.

When I read Politico Magazine’s piece, I pondered that age-old question: Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Or, in our present context: Do we as a people use insulting, demeaning, blaming, contemptuous language because our leaders do? Or do they use that kind of bile because we do?

I believe it’s the latter.

Politicians are like sail boats, riding the winds of popular opinion and sentiment.

If those winds blow from nasty places, they’ll trim their sails accordingly. However, if those sails blow from a place of respect and civility, then that’s the way they’ll tack.

Money blows a mighty big win in politics, truly. But money tends to follow the winner, and our winds — not those from the dollar — blow politicians over the finish line.

If we show civility in our daily lives — including on social media — and demand the same from our elected leaders and stop rewarding incivility with our votes, then the temperature of our public discourse will drop.

No amount of money spent or symposiums held or scorecards developed or even grassroots training can change enough of the voting public to make the difference. We have to decide for ourselves that that’s what we want, and then make it happen.

I believe that day will come, eventually, but, unfortunately, I think we’ve got years of these elevated temperatures still before us.

The problem, of course, is that today’s issues are so dire that the people on both sides of those issues see no room for compromise.

What’s the compromise on abortion when you believe it’s a life or death question? What’s the compromise when you look at the science and realize climate change is already ripping the world apart? What’s the compromise when your son or daughter is gunned down in the street?

But there, I believe, is another chicken-or-the-egg question.

Are we yelling at one another because there is no common working ground to find? Or are we failing to find the common working ground because we’re yelling at one another?

Again, I think there’s more truth in the latter.

If we could find a way to see each other as human beings who desire the best for our futures, instead of merely as opponents, we could find better ways to talk to one another about the best ways to meet those desires.

Who knows what kinds of solutions might present themselves then?

I know I’m being a bit Pollyannaish. I know things are so heated now it’ll take perhaps many miracles happening all at once to cool them off.

But each of those miracles begin in small places, in individual conversations and in individual votes and in individual actions. Each of us can make a small miracle happen today and tomorrow, and that could build to something bigger down the road.

Money and think thanks won’t make it happen.

We each have to decide for ourselves to begin.

Justin A. Hinkley can be reached at 989-354-3112 or jhinkley@thealpenanews.com. Follow him on Twitter @JustinHinkley.