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The Wedding Nazi

March 3, 2011 - Steve Schulwitz
Well, there are three months left until the "Big Day," and soon I will have a new wife and two beautiful step-daughters. It has been some time since I blogged about Andrea and my wedding preparations, so I thought an update was in order.

For the most part, we have everything in line and are ready to go. The caterer and disc jockey are on board, as well as the cake being selected and the wedding party's attire chosen. In short, we have done a good job of making plans into a reality.

I say "we" reluctantly, however. Even though I had a say in what decisions were made, my opinion really didn't matter. The final say on matters was always left up to the bride, or the wedding nazi, like I refer to her now.

Ok, maybe she isn't as bad as the former dictator, but I have no doubt in my mind every detail of this wedding was planned in her head before the words "I guess" came out of her mouth after I proposed.

She wanted pink and light brown for the bridesmaids' dresses and an ivory wedding dress for herself. I suggested I wear a white tux, but that was met with an eye roll and a "I was thinking a dark brown would look nice."

I was spared having to wear the brown tux for only one reason. She didn't like the only style offered at the store.

While I was at the store looking at the suits with my best man, in she walked, up to the counter she strolled, and looked at me and said, "If it's not going to be brown, it's black then."

Boy, is she going to be surprised when she walks down the aisle and sees my buddies and I decked out in the red tuxedos they wanted to go with.

The cake was an easy choice for her to make also. I pointed out a few I liked, and in the end, she chose the one she wanted – complete with instructions to the decorator about the changes she wants implemented to the design. I'm just happy we'll probably have a month's worth of cake left over to snack on afterward.

I did have a say in three aspects of the reception, though. I selected what was being served for dinner, what the music playlist would feature, and what will be offered at the bar. Heck, on second thought, I got to pick the food, tunes and booze. What can be better than that? I would have worn that cheesy brown tux in exchange for having my way on those.

Anyway, all that is left are a few minor things, such as filling out and sending the invitations. My bride-to-be already has plans for me involving that task as well. She notified me I'm in charge of licking the envelopes. Oh, happy day.


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